Episode 219

Last week, Sarah and I took a deep dive into the subject of AI and why it matters for parents and their children. But today in this part two episode on AI, we're gonna get practical. I mean, should kids use Chat GBT for homework? Is using AI actually cheating? What about AI companions? Is that a bad thing? how old should a kid be before using AI? What family rules actually make sense when it comes to

Interacting with AI as a family and how do we help our kids benefit from AI without becoming dependent on it. Today, we're going to give you nine specific and practical points for you to think about and actually have a conversation today about how your family with your kids wants to use AI and such an important topic.

before school comes in the fall, that you can start thinking about this over the summer, hopefully have these conversations and then really have something in place that you all understand how we're gonna use AI, how we're gonna approach it.

in your family. if you've not already done it, please take a moment to rate, review, and comment on the podcast. We'd love to hear how this conversation AI is helping you, or maybe even more questions you have about AI in your family that maybe we didn't touch upon or ways that you're killing it when it comes to teaching your kids about AI, resources you're using, you know, things that are really helping your kids have a healthy relationship with AI. We'd love to hear all of that. And if you feel like you need some parent coaching help and you're saying I really want to get on the same page with my spouse,

On how to approach topics like this, but also when it comes to discipline, when it comes to phones, when it comes to all those kind of things, reach out to me at Kyle at artofraisinghumans.com. Yeah, Kyle Art Raising Humans. And then I would love to connect with you and see if you're a good fit for the parent coaching program that I do. So hope you enjoy this conversation today and find it very informative because I think it's gonna give you all the tools you need to face AI without fear.

​

Kyle and Sara Wester (00:01.304)
Hello and welcome to the Art of Raising Humans. I'm Kyle. Hey everyone, I'm Sarah. And if you didn't join us last week, we started a conversation about AI. And basically that was kind of just a discussion about the what AI, the kind of the involvement, the interactions it's having with our kids and ways in which we as parents are approaching those topics. Yep.

And so today we wanted part two to be about like real practical steps that you could be doing today to help your kids use AI without losing critical thinking, which is so important. Yeah, kind of addressing all those little questions that we all think about, you know, the real kind of inner nitty-gritty. And so basically anytime you're helping somebody with a topic, you always want to start with awareness. You know, what is the issue? What is the problem that we're facing? What's coming at us? And then we want to move to action after that. So because most parents

Aren't asking, does AI exist? That's not the question. They're actually asking, what do I do with this? How involved should I be with this with my kid? What should I allow? What should I be concerned about? And that's the questions that we hope to address today. But the most important question, probably lots of you ask, is how do I help my child develop healthy habits around AI before those habits develop on their own?

Yeah and that's crucial. Yeah. Because they're already forming some habits. I'm telling you, the way around schoolwork, how they use it for that, and some things are just becoming normal to them because many times parents haven't jumped into this with them to kind of have these discussions. Well, you know, like kids are we know they're all kind of sponges, right? So if it's there and they're curious, so they tend to jump into things real quick when we are maybe a little slower and this is something that we need to be aware of. It's very active in their lives and and lots of times they're they're having conversations.

With other people all the time about this and ways in which AI can quote unquote help them. And we're obviously busy. So we're adults, we're we're do we're working, and maybe we're hearing things occasionally on the news or having an occasional conversation, but they're immersed in this. And what's so beautiful about the teenage brain and kids' brains is that they're open and they're receptive and they're like new things, cool. Let's try these things. I feel they're always better at technology. This is just another area of that where they tend to just really.

Kyle and Sara Wester (02:19.157)
jump on these things and get them real quick. Well and so just like I would say the emergence of social media or before that the emergence of the smartphone, this is another topic that we as parents cannot

Just sit with our heads stuck in the sand. Yep. We really need to have our eyes wide open. And so that's what we throughout this podcast, we're gonna give you a lot of tools to help you approach this with your ears open, your eyes open. Even some red flags. I mean, some here's great ways to use it. Here's some red flags to watch for. So it's a real practical episode. Well, and our goal here isn't to prevent our kids from ever using AI, because that's just not gonna happen. The goal here is to help them use AI in ways that strengthen learning, strengthen creativity, respect.

responsibility and critical thinking without replacing effort, relationships, or independent thought. Yeah. Okay. So point one. So if you have a pen or pencil, I'd encourage you start writing these down because I'm telling you, these are gonna be gold. I was just telling Sarah before this episode.

These parents are so lucky to get this information. So I'm glad I I'm excited that we get to put it together for you. 'Cause this is honestly how we as a couple talk about these things and then invite our kids into them. We kinda did a deep dive. It came up. It's been something on our minds for a while now and it's been something we've been navigating with our kids and

So then just kind of like, all right, let's dig it all up and look at it and and came up with this. Well, so some questions. The real the first question that has been going on now for a few years is should my child be using AI? You know, the reality is AI is becoming a part of your kids' school. Yeah. It's becoming a part of our work, even as adults. Yeah. It's becoming a part of everyday life. So the better question isn't should my child be using AI? It's how do we teach our children to use AI wisely?

Kyle and Sara Wester (04:04.231)
And and like in the last episode, Sarah, you compared AI to tools like a calculator.

Like search engines, like the internet. Like I I remember when the internet first came out. I'm old. I remember when we were like, Can we Google that? Should we Google that? Right? And then it became a thing. Everyone's like, yeah, I Googled it. And and you don't even think about it, right? Well, and I do remember people like, I'm not gonna ask Google that. I want to like wrestle with that and I wanna think and you'd be like, Why? Why are you doing that? I I do remember that I'd be having a discussion with a friend or something like that. Let's just look it up on Google. No, dude, I'm not gonna use that as a crutch. I wanna think through this. I'm like, dude, the answer.

Is right there. Why don't we just ask and then and we learned okay, just because it's good in Google and just because you read something and you can't trust it all, right? Yep. So there's a good mirroring there. This is just that on steroids. Yeah, but what's important, I remember even like calculators. Remember that? That was a should our kids be using that all the time to do their math problems? Because then what if they go into the workplace and they can't add up money and they can't do that? Okay, let's be really old. Yeah, remember it with typing. Yes.

Yeah. You need to write. Actually, I say really old, but but our kids in elementary school face this too. Where I remember we had the my daughter had a a teacher who was like, You need to write everything. And I'm thinking

They're growing up in a world where you need to type. I actually want my daughter to type sometimes too. I don't want just everything handwritten. So, so there you go too. It's like, where do you use this whole I want it all handwritten and you know, where so this this is just part of the human experience, right? We get these advancements and where do you use them and where don't you use them? I remember in high school, one of my most annoying classes was keyboarding, and I did that for a whole semester. And the whole time I'm thinking, why do I need this? This is so stupid. Because at the time I didn't have a computer. So I was like, why do I No, this is not gonna take all

Kyle and Sara Wester (05:47.04)
And then but then in college, I was like, I'm so glad I took that class on typing or on keyboard. So each of these advancements required guidance, not avoidance. Avoidance isn't gonna help. It's gonna be that guidance, okay? So we want to be able in this podcast to move from fear to mentorship. Rather than asking how do I stop my child from using AI too much, I want to ask how do I teach my child to use AI in a responsible way?

so first of all, let's talk about you know, we point point one we kind of covered point two would be what about using AI for homework cheating? 'Cause that's happening a whole lot, right? And actually having been a student in college and everything, I'm

little jealous of some of the ways it can actually really help. Yeah. What with the struggle was real and they could just bypass some of that. And I have heard parents approach it different ways, Sarah. Some very upset about it, think it's a matter of integrity. Yeah. Other ones are like, that class is dumb. Like if you can get through that class, that's all I care about. Just graduate. Get it over with, right? And I can see both sides of that because at times it does seem to be the work is it doesn't seem to be that important or meaningless. Yeah, that all if you're I

Yeah, I can see that. It's like, why do I need to know this person thousands of years ago and humanities did this thing, has nothing to do with my future career. And yeah. Well, and the point is it's just not a simple answer. Yeah. So just saying, like initially, maybe like, you know, we're people who we we believe being honest, having integrity. So the first response is no, you don't use AI for cheating. But but but there are some some some ways in which, like I said, parents see some positives and how it's being used in that way. What one is it can help explain difficult concepts.

Yep. Yeah, I've heard kids say that. I didn't get this math concept. My teacher sucked at explaining it. AI explained it much better. Yeah. Okay. I love that one because it is true. I, you know, we've all had that experience where one person tells us something, we're like, what? And then someone else explains it a different way, and it all comes together for you. So that teacher might even have a brilliant explanation, but it's not hidden home for the for your kid. So

Kyle and Sara Wester (07:52.384)
AI can be a useful tool when you're doing homework and it's like I still don't understand how this works. And you can look up and it'll explain it in different ways. It'll help even the parent. If I'm trying to help my daughter do something and and the concept is hard, it can explain it to me, then I can figure out the language to help her. So that's a really helpful. I've seen kids use it to create practice questions. Yeah.

I've seen kids use it to quiz before a test, right? I've seen kids use it. We've used this to help brainstorm ideas. We use it a lot of giving feedback on writing. I heard one kid talk about that, how he would take his his paper, take the rubric the teacher had, put it through AI, and AI would tell him what kind of grade he should get on that. Like, hey, you missed some. And and it's really kind of like going to a writing lab, right? It can be a it can be useful.

If you use it right. And and of course this is ethics of all of this has to do it's a constant ethical conversation really.

It can also help a kid understand directions better. Maybe the directions are written in a confusing way. I've also had seen a kid use it like where they needed to do research and they were thinking about diving into this 10 page research thing. And and he thought, I'm just gonna have AI kind of sum it up, not to just make that the case, like I don't have to read it now, but to see if it actually was gonna help him with the research he was doing. So once it's summed up, he's like, yeah, this research will be. Then he read the whole thing, right? but

Here's some ways it does like it can hurt a kid. So one of those is when kids start using it to write their papers for them. You know, I mean that's obvious that that's a a real hindrance to their ability to write papers in the future, completing their assignments for them.

Kyle and Sara Wester (09:25.519)
solving every problem that they have on on a a math sheet or something like that for them, or just doing the thinking for them. Many times even doing the reading for them. Like read the book and then tell me all about the book. And they'll just do that rather than actually reading the book, you know? So the issue though that we're trying to point out with this point isn't AI. The issue is whether learning is still happening.

So, you know, for us, we try to switch our focus. What is the learning that is happening? What are the habits that are being formed? Yeah. I when I was crafting this, I was really thinking, man, it is an ethical conversation and in some ways it can feel really good bad. Bad people do this, good people do that. And I wouldn't and I really kind of want to avoid that because I don't think that's always very helpful to the bigger picture and the conversations we're having. If we make everything real black and white and try to fit into tight little boxes, those boxes don't really work. We know everyone's different.

Learning styles are different. What you could have a different class, you could have a teacher whose goal is this, and another teacher whose goal is that, you know. So so instead of doing that, you know, I I was thinking long about this wording and I liked eventually it landed on growth promoting uses, you know, where it's so I look at it through the lens of is this helping my child grow? You know, if it's writing the paper for them, I personally don't see the growth, right? But

So I look at and go, it spelled it it helped with spell check. You know, or there there's certain things that, you know, it helped them find resources, things that are helping them growing, but they're digging through. And then growth limiting. If it to me, my child isn't gonna grow if a paper's written for them, if all their math equations are solved for them, then that's limiting their growth. And I want my child to grow. I want my child to learn. So that lens was something I liked. I liked that language as I was wrestling with this topic and and trying to figure out, well.

What is it? How would I, you know, determine if this is something that's okay? And it could even change over time. So with that lens to me, I could say, Well, in this instance, that's gonna limit you. Yeah.

Kyle and Sara Wester (11:23.745)
But in this instance, I see how it's gonna help you grow. And so to teach my child to kind of look through that, which one is what's helping me here? I like spell check as a good example. Like that's an example where I could use it both ways. Yeah. I could just like use it as a crutch where I don't ever need to learn how to spell. Or when they do spell check, I didn't know how to spell that word. That's great. I could use it as a way to understand how to spell it. You know, that's one I think every listener can understand in a small way, right? But basically with this point, point two.

Instead of asking how do I how did AI help you learn? Well, Ronnie to ask a different question of how did AI help you learn this, right? So is it a growth promoting use or a growth limiting use? Okay, so point three.

How much AI is appropriate at different ages. Okay. So let's kind of walk through the different developmental stages of our kids and how much of their interactions with AI could be helpful or hurtful to them. Yeah. I felt like this is really big, right? Because we got little kids going into AI AI and it looks really different. I mean, our littlest ones, people they won't even know life without AI, you know, and that's just crazy to think about, you know. And then for us, you know, we've got teenagers. So we're thinking, okay, that looks

vastly different. And I need to prepare them. Got a kid going off to college. Yeah. You know, how that is a very different look on AI. So wanted to kind of break this down and and inspire some thinking. Yeah. Yeah. So we just basically got like three or four points on each kind of basic school age place your kids might be at. So if your kids are in elementary school.

So basically three ideas we were thinking of there would be a lot of parent guided use. So anytime the kid is using, you're there with them, guiding them. being curious and and like exploring with them, like how

Kyle and Sara Wester (13:06.029)
How is this, what are you using it for? What's what is AI doing for you here? And then learning together. So it's all very collaborative. It's all very almost like hand in hand. You know, I see you're very close to your kid. Yeah. The kid isn't doing it on their own. It's not a solitary thing. It's always something with you. Yeah, because you know, our young ones can fall into something and not realize it. The conversation we had last week about the chat bots, you know, and building relationship. These little kids could fall into talking to a chat bot real easy and and not have the right. They wouldn't know.

That whoa, I'm building this relationship. It's not real. Yeah. You know, and they wouldn't know to question to have all those thoughts that maybe an older child would be a little more aware of. So we want to be very close to our young ones, right? We want to be close to see what's going About what's being So we know what to yes. We know how to be there and teach them. And so when when the kids are in middle school, more there, you're wanting to have conversations about the accuracy of the information. You know, is is the information you're getting really true, factual, right?

Learning how AI works, like where who's who's who's feeding all this information? Where does it come from, right? Yeah, get them asking those things. Have them wondering because they they're their brains coming into a little more critical thinking where they can have those kind of those challenges come to mind. Yeah, is all the different places like Chat GPT, is that the same as Gemini? Is that the same as Siri? Is that like what what are all these different like I think that would be a lot of really good conversations? Yeah, what do they offer? What are their downsides? So they're seeing it.

As this thing out there, you know, that that can be examined and changed and manipulated. Well, even is one better than the other? Is one more accurate than the other? And then the last part in middle school would be building critical thinking skills. So we hit upon that quite a bit in the blast episode, but just really starting to have that conversation about how do you think for yourself? Like let's not be just letting AI think for us. You can use it as a tool to give you information, but how do you really break that down and come to decisions yourself? And make sure that we're hanging on to our humanity at all times and our creation.

Creativity and our innovation and and and all of those skills that we discussed last time. And then for high school kids, there there's obviously going to be more independent use. So obviously you can't, you're not gonna be monitoring everything that's going on with AI, but that's where the discussion comes about what are the ethics of using AI? You know, what ways do we remain, keep our humanity

Kyle and Sara Wester (15:25.321)
And not just move into just taking this stuff and just using it for anything and everything, right? Whether it's for cheating, whether it's for man, even like I could see I could be used for relationships on using AI to teach me how to talk to this other person and like you know, and or using it as a way to avoid those interactions, you know. that's just that awareness of like here, it could be great. Let's use it and I wanna be I wanna be very aware and cautious in this area. And then that goes into academic integrity, how you're using in school, and then the last one be.

privacy and responsibility because lots of times in maybe you're giving information to the AI that the AI should not have, you know, whether you're freely giving pictures or freely giving all those kinds of things. I think this is this is where this is one that for me is kind of big for kids because they're not always aware. They forget. I guess they easily forget. We know this even in the texting world and and little group world, you know, they get on there and they say things and they think it just lives there. And we need to remember with AI

It goes everywhere. It is not secure. Even if you think it's secure, you should not trust it. You shouldn't share personal information. Children need to know that. teenagers need to know that because they can be caught up in moments and not realize that this you're putting something out there and

You don't have control. Right. Even, you know, your address, personal information, you do not want to be sharing and putting these things into these public spaces that you do not have management of. It's gone once it's out there. so with point three, the younger the child, the more involvement they need. And think coaching rather than unrestricted access. Okay.

So point four, these are some red flags that parents should watch out for. So most AI use is not dangerous, but there are some signs that definitely deserve our focused attention. So red flag number one is using AI as a primary source of emotional support. I mean, they're more and more, you're gonna see that in the news of kids going to get counseling per se from an AI. You know, what AI does is just continue to be kind of people pleasing. you know, it it the

Kyle and Sara Wester (17:33.982)
They talk about the idea of s psychopancy, which is the idea of you just keep getting the feedback that you want to hear. And that's actually not what a therapist is doing. A therapist is challenging ideas or challenging thoughts, pointing out inconsistence in the ways in which you're bro. But that's not what AI is gonna do. AI is gonna keep telling the kid kind of what they they like, you know, and that's that can be dangerous. Right.

and that's led to unfortunately some really sad things where kids have taken their lives and things like that. I'm sure everyone has seen those headlines and it's something we really do need to be careful of because they get so deep in this relationship, it feels so real. And we want to prevent them because it's really hard to pull out of that when it feels so real, you know, with their brain development, where they're at. It that's a really hard thing. So we want to be cautious to not let that

go there, you know, and it's something that we're gonna have to have ongoing conversations as a community, just

As as humans who are caring for our kids and even ourselves, it's something I think it's gonna develop over time and we're gonna have to have lots of conversations about it. Yeah, so red flag number two would be watching for secretive AI use. So a lot of the kids hiding and using it and not being open and honest about what they're using it for. red flag number three would be heavy dependence on AI for schoolwork. So once again we talk there may be moments where you see it's helpful, but it's great, very helpful. But if it's like the only tool you're using, if they're out.

outsourcing their brain. Yeah. Then they're not growing their brain. Red flag number four, replacing friendships with AI interactions. So once again, I've had clients in my office who that's what they're doing rather than talking to friends, because that can be scary. There's possible risk of rejection and you know all types of complications. It's just easier to talk to the AI, right? Yeah. And then red flag number five would be avoiding struggle, effort, or problem solving.

Kyle and Sara Wester (19:20.393)
and just giving that to the AI to do for them. Okay. So you want to ask yourself these questions. Is AI helping my child grow or helping my child avoid growth? And those are two very different outcomes. Okay.

So, point number five, privacy and personal information. Sarah, you were kind of hitting upon this earlier. Yeah. Is many children assume AI works like a trusted friend. You can just tell it whatever, you know? But AI is not your trusted friend. It is not. And it's important for like with our kids, we don't want them being scared of it, but it's not your freaking trusted friend. Okay, it's just not. Okay. Kids need to understand. We don't want you sharing passwords with AI. We don't want you sharing your personal information. Don't be sharing your private family details with AI.

Don't upload photos without permission. Don't assume everything is confidential. And I know that's just five. I'm sure there's a more.

Yeah you're educating AI. Yes. Right. So the more you're giving it it, the more yeah. So just you've gotta be cautious. Every all of us need to be cautious. Yeah, yeah. Well go in and be very thoughtful. Don't don't get just let all your bo your barriers down and just start sharing everything, right? And and I think that's the risk too with looking at it for mental health stuff or just just like helping it resolve all your conflicts is like it does keep store of all that stuff, right? It's it's not forgetting it. It's remembering it. But it it but it doesn't have that.

Critical, right? We're training it. So it gets lots of things wrong. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. Well, and it's very much like Sarah, when I'm talking to families, you'll hear from different families when there's a conflict, different stories from each other in the conflict. The AI isn't getting those. It's just getting one. Yeah. And then acting as if that story is the correct. And you know that, right? We've all had that experience where if your child went and said everything that happened

Kyle and Sara Wester (21:05.259)
You'd be thinking, whoa, whoa, whoa. There's a lot of things they're missing, right? Even though their their perspective is valid, it's missing a lot of pieces. So

Well well, and that's how a real human interaction would happen is the kid would share their experience. And if if you can empathize with it, say, Hey, I understand that's how you see you see it. But then you're holding. And then and then you could say, This is how I saw it, right? Yeah. And then the kid could get a new perspective, not just getting come together. Yeah, rather than just getting their perspective reinforced, they're able to see a more whole picture. And that's what we really want for the kids. So so you want to be able to make sure when it comes to privacy and personal information, that you sit down with your kids and we create some family, some simple.

Family guidelines around privacy. We don't rely on fear. Help children understand why privacy matters. And what we mean by don't rely on fear is we don't just want to tell them all the scary things that can happen if you do. It's really just like we really want to respect each other's privacy and understand this impacts the whole family when you share this kind of stuff. Okay. So point number six is is a let me give it here. Point number six, sorry. Point number six, okay.

Yes, I'm glad I got to it. Point number six is will AI make my child lazy? Yeah, this is a big one, right? We just think, Yeah. Yes, there'd be some. They're gonna do anything. Yeah, I know. Never gonna do AI's gonna do anything. Exactly. It's gonna do all of them. Get their food for them, pamper them. Yes. I mean some of that will be. It's probably true, yes, yeah. And this this is one of the biggest concerns many parents have. That's what I'm glad I found. if AI can write, solve, explain, summarize, and create, will kids just stop thinking for themselves?

And the answer is maybe. Maybe you know. So the real danger isn't AI. That's not the danger. The danger is outsourcing the struggle, right? And we gotta be honest, Sarah's parents, we kind of want to do that too. Like some of us, like we want, and sometimes it's good. Like AI could we could outsource that struggle. It's something you do not like. I'm going back to Google, I remember how many times we would stress out and struggle because we would think.

Kyle and Sara Wester (23:06.101)
I've seen that actor somewhere before. What other movie has he been in? And then all that week I'd actually to think of it. Yeah, all that week I'd be thinking of. Kids nowadays don't have to think of anything. I'd be like talking to friends. Have you seen you see that one movie which Google it? Where's that song from? And then we'd be Can we just Google this? And then we did it. And it was so refreshing. Just to be just like, let's just Google that and not worry about There's some things like that that are are great. Yes, because it's who cares? It doesn't matter where that song came from. Like the refrigerator. You know, when you've been at the store and you think, wait.

Do I don't I don't know how much milk we have? Do we have any milk left? And then they got those free we don't have one of these, but those fridges that just look at it and go, Yeah, no milk in their fridge. That'd be crazy. You know, so there are some very great. If you're a listener and you have one of those refrigerators, are they awesome? It doesn't really work. I think our fridge sometimes is so stacked. I don't know how it really I know how it would see that. How you know what's under the but well? Here's what we know is we don't want to outsource the struggle because we know kids grow through practice, they grow through.

effort, frustration, making mistakes, and then persevering through those mistakes. Those experiences we know through research, they build resilience in your kids, they help them feel confident and competent. If AI removes all those challenges, your kids' growth is going to suffer. So yeah. So we don't want to do the question we don't want to keep asking is, can my child use AI? It's is my child still doing the thinking.

The goal isn't removing all struggle. The goal is helping children develop the skills they need to navigate. That's such a big conversation, right? Cause we think so much about I want my child happy. I want a happy life. And and yet we know time after time of time, it is the struggle that's so such an important part of the human experience where we do build resiliency. It's not because you're not resilient when everything was handed to you and easy in life, right? Yep. There

Creativity. We most some of the best inventions, the light bulb being a common one to mention, it was through massive struggle that we got electricity, lights, the light bulb. And so we that is a great part of the human experience that we don't want to remove from our child. It's robbing them. Yep. Okay, so point seven. Let's teach our kids how to think with AI. So AI literacy.

Kyle and Sara Wester (25:17.875)
Is becoming the new digital literacy. So Sarah and I have done podcasts about this before when it comes to social media, helping our kids be literate on and aware about how to use social media in a positive way instead of a way that it just sucks them into comparison and all these negative things. In the same way, think of AI as like you're trying to teach them almost how to how to read a book, but you're how to read and understand AI. So years ago, we taught things like don't talk to strangers online, which is a very important thing to learn. I parents are still emphasizing that.

your passwords. Be careful what you share. Don't just put everything out there, right? But now kids also need to know AI makes mistakes. Yeah. AI can be biased. Yep. AI doesn't always know the truth.

And AI sounds more confident than it probably should. And so those are just four things that we we kind of discovered in just our discussions and our research that are very important for kids to better understand it, to go in with a more honest perspective of what AI is and what it is not.

but we as parents, we need AI literacy too. And many of us are learning, I'd say many of all of us are learning alongside our kids about these things. Cause many times we we forget these things. Right. Yeah.

I have lots of examples where we've kind of played. So I I I I work this stuff out. This is real for us. We do this with our kids. And and so I've I've point out to my kids, I love to find times where it's wrong and be like, look, but it sounds so good and it sounds so confident. But then I'll and and then I will be something I know actually on my own. Yeah. And so I'll challenge, I'll Well, what about this? And it's, you know what? You're right. And it'll, you know.

Kyle and Sara Wester (27:00.765)
But if you don't know to challenge it and then I love even its response, you know, it's so complimentary. You're right. Yes, that is exact you know, but but there's so many examples I have like that where I was able to catch it, but then it does cause me to think, where am I not catching it? you know. So we always have to have that just in our minds and that questioning and to do that with your kids. So I always try to point it out to my kids so they yeah, don't trust it. Well, so this is a family exercise you could do together with your kids is

Just use AI together and then do exactly what you're asking. What did it get right? What did it miss? How how would we even verify if that's true? Yeah. How how would would you trust this answer? Right. And so that's a really good conversation. You could sit down, it'd be a whole fun game. Have your kids ask certain questions, see what comes up, right? Yeah. and then so basically we want to on this point to teach children how to evaluate information rather than just blindly accept it. Okay. So point A, eight.

Is how AI can actually help kids learn.

So much of the conversation around A AI focuses on the risks, like we just covered. There are a lot of risks. Yeah. But there are real benefits when it's used intentionally. So AI can help kids in many ways. Understand difficult concepts, practice foreign languages, which is super cool. I I have a client who just got back from Japan and was having whole conversations with Japanese people by just using the AI to like interpret what they were saying. Yeah, yeah. I I I know I can't remember if this is on the list, but it's been really helpful for coming up with quiz questions.

Yeah, like to prep for a test. It's been yeah, no, I've had kids, yeah, who will do that, we'll take a whole practice quiz. Explore new interests.

Kyle and Sara Wester (28:36.567)
Build study guides, which is cool, generate creative ideas, and then also receive personalized explanations in in a way in which you understand them, which is really helpful, right? So here we want to teach children to use AI as a tutor. You know, it can be used as a tutor, not a replacement, but just a tool. And also it's it doesn't need to be a shortcut, right? It's just a tool to help you better understand so then you can learn how to get there yourself. Okay. So point nine, and this is our last point, is creating.

your family AI plan. So this is what we've built been building to with all these points is eventually we hope through this podcast you will sit down this summer, start creating your own family AI plan before school comes up in the fall. Yeah. So you can start doing this with them. Okay. So every every family's gonna approach approach it differently. Yeah. No, I was just gonna say, of course, this is what we always want to come back to is things done in relationship, done with connection.

That will get you so far instead of you coming up with it and going, Here's my new AI plan. Yes, do this with your child and it helps build that relationship that's gonna last for years and years and years. Yeah.

Yeah, and also maybe a basis foundation for how they're going to do it in their own families in the future. but every every family needs to have a conversation about this. So here's some here's some questions we came up with. You can come up with some yourself. If you get have some great questions we miss, again, we'd love to hear them. So send them to us. So questions to discuss. What AI tools are okay? when should parents be involved? What are our expectations expectations around using AI for schoolwork? How do we handle privacy with AI?

What concerns do we have about AI in our family? What values do we want guiding our decisions and how we use AI? And remember, when you're when you're thinking about these questions, the goal isn't creating perfect rules.

Kyle and Sara Wester (30:28.705)
The goal is creating an ongoing conversation because even with these questions, the answers you come up with might change within weeks, months after you And make sure when you're asking the questions that you let your kids answer them. Cause you know, we've always got these ideas and and as parents sometimes real tempted to jump in and ask the question and then give about five seconds and then you're answering it. And you really want to let your kid kind of wrestle with it and think about it because it's a great opportunity. Your kids may have heard about some story where something went wrong with AI.

or a kid or they may be more aware of some things and and even know about AI agents or how it's being used in ways that you don't. So let this be something where they come to you and they are able to share and you just kind of be quiet for a bit and and let them talk.

Yeah, remember your focus is to move away from controlling it to coaching it, move away from monitoring to mentoring. And you're you're you're wanting to stay curious, stay engaged, and just keep the conversation going, right? So it's not like we're just having to figure it all in that one conversation. It's an ongoing thing. And like you said, the kids may need to think about it. They may come up with something brilliant the next day, whatever. But if just make it part of your regular conversation, then they can be like, hey, you know what? So and so I heard them did this, you know, and and that'll be something that's talked about regularly.

Openly in your family. And and so I we want to encourage you that as a society, we have navigated a lot of things throughout our lives. Okay. As parents, we've navigated television. You know, when that came in. And especially when we went from having four channels to like 200, 300, 1000s of channels, right? Streaming. Yes. We've navigated the internet. We've navigated smartphones, social media. Now we're just learning how to navigate AI.

And and and those kind of if you're still struggling with some of those past ones, these same things that we're doing here will help you with those as well. Right. but the answer to any of those is not becoming more and more afraid. The answer isn't also just blind trust and like a laissez faire. It's all gonna work out because it might not. Okay. But the answer is always, always connection and relationship.

Kyle and Sara Wester (32:35.435)
The strongest protection for our kids to be safe, for our children to have isn't a filter or an app. It's our parents like continual connection with the kids, right? It's none of those external things are gonna keep them as safe as the relationship with you. it's a connected relationship with adults who are willing to stay in curious, stay engaged, and keep having the conversation with them.

Because AI will continue to evolve. It will continue to change. But children will always continue to need wisdom and guidance. They'll still need our help, our discipleship, our mentoring, and they're still gonna need us.

And so that's what we really want to end this conversation with AI is as much as it can help, as much as it can hurt, your kids are still gonna need you. They're gonna need your help. And what I love about this discussion that I think is so fascinating is I love a topic that I really can't come in and say, I know everything about this. I can't come to my kids and say, well, in my day, the way we did AI, I really just can't because even with phones, I kind of was able to do that somewhat. Like I know how I I'm we've had phones longer than you have, whatever, right? But for them, this is all brand new.

And we're all learning together. So it's a really good topic to be humble and say, hey, I know some things about being human. I know some things how to do relate, but I don't know how to totally do this with you. And I want to learn with you. Right. And I think that can be really exciting for kids. And so I would encourage you to use this what could be a scary, divisive, conflicting thing.

And instead, use it as an opportunity to grow closer, get more connected, have deeper and deeper conversations about how to critically think through these difficult things. Okay. So we really hope that this topic and this information really helps you be able to face it with confidence and clarity, right? because Sarah and I are passionate about us growing and evolving and changing along with our kids, but along with you as well. And so we please share this podcast with friends you know that are dealing with this subject, and everybody is. So go ahead and share.

Kyle and Sara Wester (34:37.337)
with everybody and we'd love to hear your comments on how this topic and our information has helped you today. So hope you have a wonderful day and enjoy that conversation about AI with your kids.